Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Friday the whatnow?

Before I go any further I would like to mention I had originally intended to get this done and up by the actual Friday the 13th so I could participate in the awesome Final Girl Friday the 13th Blog-a-Thon. Unfortunately due to a series of unfortunate incidents (probably not involving Jim Carrey) I wasn't able to make deadline...

That doesn't mean I'm just going to roll over and be silent. In fact this is going to be quite rant-ish! You see I watched “Friday the 13th” for the first time last week. Yep I said first time. Some day maybe I'll tell you about how I was tortured with horror movies when I was younger and so only now in my 26th year of life have I seen both “Halloween” and “Friday the 13th” for the first time....I still haven't watched “A Nightmare on Elm Street”.

So, onto “Friday.” I'm skipping my regular(boring) semi-review, we all know whats up here. Bad stuff happened at a camp a long time ago, camp is about to reopen, bad stuff happens again, yadda yadda yadda. Right? ...Though if I were doing my review I would mention how I was very pleasantly surprised that this was a “Holy shit there is a psycho killing people” movie instead of a “Holy shit there is a supernatural psycho killing people” movie.

Instead I am just going to point out the one scene that blew my mind in a bad way¹....

Picture it, you are in a cabin on a dark rainy night with nothing to do, it is decided a game is to be played, someone grabs Monopoly and hauls it over. Then all of a sudden out of nowhere Alice exclaims “I hate Monopoly”....Really Alice, hate? You hate Monopoly? Are you even an American...no screw that are you even a human? Hate Monopoly??? Do you hate the flag and puppies as well? I suppose you stomp kittens in your spare time as well? I assume you have plenty of spare time, what with your “hate” of Monopoly! ....I'll be honest, I can't wait until I get Friday the 13th part 2 in the mail now just because I KNOW that Alice and her Monopoly hating days must come to an unpleasant end.

...But lets not dwell on the girl who didn't die, lets focus on one that did(and probably deserved it as you will see). Ok, back to this “Strip Monopoly” game they are playing. First off, I'd like to know who set up the rates because if landing on a freshly bought Baltic require the loss of a shoe what happens with a hotel laden Boardwalk? My guess is some sort of ritual sex act...

Anywhoozle back to Brenda. At first during this scene I thought I was going to end up liking her, I mean after all she wanted to play Monopoly (See that Alice, she knows what is good!), in fact she even made up Strip Monopoly which combines two very fine past times(though not very well as I mentioned above). So what happened that made me turn on Brenda as quick as I did on that nutjob Alice? Well just take a gander at the posted picture.

See what the problem is? No? Let me help, after Brenda rolls the dice she exclaims “Double sixes, I get to go again” or something to that effect...Do you see the trouble now? Brenda is a filthy cheat and a liar, just take a look at the blown up version(I know it isn't as clear as I would have liked either) clearly you can see that the dice do now show a six and another six, they show a one and a two, yup good ol' Acey Ducey. So you see Brenda was a cheat and after that whatever she got she had coming to her!

But like I said, other than the one scene there I really enjoyed the movie. Especially since I suspect Beastie Boy involvement

¹ You should be able to tell this is pretty much completely tongue in cheek²

² But seriously..who hates Monopoly?

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