Its been too long, but I have an excuse! (yeah thats the ticket) AKA my epic FGFC Fail

So right now you should be reading my thoughts on this months FGFC pick "L'Anticristo" aka "The Antichrist" aka "The Tempter." Well you should be reading that except Netflix had other ideas and didn't seem to have enough supply to meet demand so I couldn't get it from them, then I lucked out and was able to rent it locally, or I would have lucked out if the DVD had been playable. So a full review was just out of reach.

That meant plan B, make glib remarks and/or smartass comments about the trailer. Well you aren't seeing that right now because last week my trusty laptop decided it was time to part ways with its hard drive. That was bad, but not quite as bad as yesterday morning when I woke up to find my desktop giving me the stinkeye and refusing to do a thing. Can you believe it, cataclysmic failure on both of my computers in short order. I'm only able to type this up thank to a Linux Live CD on my hard drive free laptop... I can only blame a failure this complete on one thing....This must be the work of the fucking "Phantom Menace"...Curses!

Also lost (and I'm praying I can recover this) is the first leg of my project, a list. One favorite movie for every year I have been alive. It is a huge pain to go through IMDB by year choosing a list of movies to narrow down trust me. Damn you "Phantom Menace" damn you to hell!

So even though I can't watch youtube videos myself at the moment that doesn't mean I can't link them, so here you watch and you comment. Me, I'll be out searching for a new laptop....



Oh also XBox 360 users, I had a chance to get the NXE a day early. So I can tell you that it is a new experience, it is pretty. The UI isn't my cup of tea honestly, and the avatar thing is a little too Wii-like for my taste. But the menu on the XBox button lets you skip the new UI if you want so that is good, but where the update really shines for me is the Netflix streaming. It was completely simple to set up, the interface there works like a dream, and I actually ended up getting higher quality video on my XBox than I did on my computer. Fun could be had with the feature to sync up a Netflix streaming movie and watch with friends.

Now get off my lawn!

TTFATF on Mario Paint??

This totally made my Friend Feed account worth it. This popped up as something a friend of a friend posted and it totally blew me away. Dragonforce's "Through the Fire and the Flames" on Mario Paint!



A few other things the FF has pointed me towards:

The ridiculousness of SF MOMA

A discussion on Bad Words

and The Monkees!

Once more into the breach!

So I've been elusive again. Where was I? Simple answer, I've been busier than I thought I would be. Slightly longer answer? Well..

As you may or may not know I do some light site maintenance* and post the podcast version of the shows for Talk It Over Radio. They recently have been picked up and will now be airing not only on the Internets, but also over California airwaves on KERI 1180 AM. Which obviously is quite awesome, but also means I've been trying to tweak the site a bit here and there and make it as pretty as I can. So there is part of it.

Also you may or (more probably) may not know that originally I signed on for some light site maintenance* of the predecessor to Talk It Over Weezy and The Swish. Well the big news is that Weezy and The Swish is back! Really freaking sweet! But then that meant that I had to rebuild the WaTS website which was taken over by TIO. That took a bit of time, but I think it came out functional. Utilizing my TARDIS to get the posts in the correct time frame and getting the images etc.. put back in was the bear of the work. But really worth it to get the show back. Incidentally Weezy and The Swish is actually back Tonight, 7PM eastern, so about what 25 minutes from now (I'd better hurry!).

What else have I been up to? Well I watched 3 different “Jaws” movies on the 4th, I still have some complaining things to say about “The Incredible Hulk”.

I've been spending quite a bit of time over on Friend Feed, Twitter, and Plurk. Microblogging insanity is easy for me to handle...Especially when I'm running on a day where I never went to bed the night before like today. Tonight I probably crash early....maybe.

Oh yes, and this...

R.I.P. George Carlin

As I sat down tonight to write up my thoughts on “Lifeforce,” this month's FGFC pick I heard the news of the passing of the great George Carlin. Which really tore me up. Actually it was a lot like a punch straight to my gut. Something I just wasn't ready to hear, something I don't think I would ever have been ready to hear.

Many people don't know this but between the ages of about 7 and 15 or so if anyone asked me what my dream job was, what I hoped or wished I could be I had a two word answer, “Writer, Comedian.” That is no lie, and it I did then, and still do attribute it mainly to the man whom in my head I always refer to as “The Icon” George Carlin. Carlin was the first comedian that I ever witnessed that truly captured the entirety of my interest.

I've always believed that the mark of a great comedian is not just someone who can make you laugh, but someone who can make you laugh and provoke thought. Carlin was great at that, his views on language were legendary. Which was appropriate, after all he wrote and spoke for a living so language was his playground was it not?

One of the most powerful beliefs I have always had is a direct result of Carlin, that being that the words we use only have the power that we allow them to have.

The best way I've found to fight the sadness of this great loss is to honor the man and view his work. Here is a fantastic clip which will show you what I am talking about far better than any words I could possibly say.



Notice the beauty of his performance. The words he uses, how he uses them. His body language. The pace he uses, coming on strong and hard really hitting hard with some jokes then smartly cooling it down slower and quieter with the more subtle just so he can bring you back. Like I said and I truly believe it is an art.

Adam Sessler is the man

Yep I said it and I mean it. Need proof? Check this out, Adam talks about a subject that has bothered me about online gaming for years.



If people actually start taking Adam's advice maybe I'll one day re-upgrade my Xbox live back to gold....maybe.



Now if you'll excuse me I'm off to take my dad to see "The Incredible Hulk" for some early Father's Day fun. I tried, I really tried to get him to choose Iron Man instead, but alas the choice was his. As for myself I subscribe to Kim's way of thinking on "Hulk" movies.


Excelsior!

Rock on Wright!

Why am I not more productive ?

Because when I should be sleeping and resting my mind I instead find myself completely and utterly distracted by things like this



If you want to see all of the lyrics click here


This rocks pretty hard too



Star Trek in German is pretty awesome.

It's Always Fair Weather

I have yet to actually see the movie, but this scene alone definitely puts it on my ASAP list.

My most entertaining post ever.

I've been spending a lot of time checking out Hulu.com and I have to say I'm impressed. I've watched some episodes of 30 Rock, the entire first season of Babylon 5 and a TON of clips. One of the most fun things about Hulu though is the ability to embed video.

In that spirit I give to you "Some Like It Hot"


Believe me the stuff I've been watching on Hulu has been infinitely more entertaining than the movies I've seen lately. But there will be more on that coming soon....

Bust a Bucket who'd a dunk it Blazer duty Super sunk it Slamn' Geez it Killer Three's it go up get it got it good

FGFC: "Near Dark"

I think we are all hip to what time it is now right? You remember, the FGFC brought to us by the always awesome Stacie Ponder from Final Girl fame. So the chosen one this month was "Near Dark." A bold choice for Stacie to be sure, what with nearly half the cast being fresh off the set of "Aliens" and thus could potentially still have smelled of Reiser. Well gambled Stacie, well gambled indeed.


The basics
Nathan Petrelli Caleb (Adrian Pasdar) is a rowdy country youth who one night happens across Mae (Jenny Wright) at a gas station. Being a red blooded young male Caleb decides to chat Mae up a bit, ya know ask for a taste of her ice cream cone (literally). One thing leads to another and the two go for a nighttime drive. Just when things start to heat up a bit Mae realizes that it is getting early, she demands that Caleb take her home. Well he doesn't know she's a vampire so he kind of tries to dissuade her from leaving. This earns him a bite, after which Mae hops out of the car and scurries off leaving Caleb to start turning (and burning!) on his own.

As Caleb is slowly making his way home, his little sister Sarah and their dad Loy notice him and his smokiness just in time for a mysterious motor home to speed up on him and swoop him away. Turns out the motor home belongs to the group of vampires that Mae belongs to. Caleb meets his new "family" under imperfect circumstances, the crazy one of the group Severen (Bill Paxton) would very much like to remove his Caleb's head from his body, and nobody else seems to think that such a bad idea. Save for Mae who claims him and promises to teach him their ways.

Caleb is having issues with his new life, he doesn't want to kill, maybe he can't. Even with Mae's help he isn't able. The group has two choices at this point. Kill him, or help him. Fun loving lot that they are they decide to stage a little fun in Caleb's honor. They take him to a little country bar for a few drinks and a little slaughter, not necessarily in that order. Caleb learns that he has some pretty amazing strength, that bullets don't kill him, and that yep he can't kill. Still before he learned that he didn't stop everyone else from having their mayhem.

Unfortunately the one that Caleb let get away went straight to the cops (a little murder and he goes tattling) so their daytime slumber is interrupted by a gunfight. The sun being problematic they aren't doing so hot so Caleb grabs the van keys a blanket and hurls himself out the window and makes a break for it. Once in the safety of a new motel later that night it seems as if Caleb is being somewhat forgiven if not accepted for his bravery. That is until the resident child sized vampire Homer is out for a smoke when he comes across Sarah, Caleb's little sister, who is traveling with her dad tracking Caleb down as they don't know why he disappeared.

Homer takes a liking to Sarah. Once Caleb finds out about it things take a turn. Loy, their dad is brought to the room with the idea that these people tracking them must be eliminated. Not if Caleb has his way! Some gunshots and fighting ensue, Caleb gets Loy and Sarah and they bolt. Caleb really can't explain what has happened easily, but he demands that Loy not take him to a hospital. Instead he has the idea to try a little blood transfusion to see about curing his newly acquired thirst. Which it does.

The next night Mae comes to Caleb. Clearly the clever hiding place of their house didn't work! Mae seemingly just wants to see Caleb, but while they are busy making out Sarah is busy being kidnapped. Once he realizes what is up Caleb makes his pursuit, on horseback no less (which ended up making a really cool image).

On the way to Sarah Caleb runs into and has a tussle with Severen, who is angry over the betrayal. The fight eventually leads Caleb into a semi-truck which he uses to try and run over Severen. The plan doesn't work out as he only gets hurt and is left clinging to the hood of the truck taunting Caleb and punching his way into the hood to rip things apart. Caleb jackknifes the truck, jumping out just before it and the still attached Severen explodes. One down!

Before Jesse and Diamondback get a chance to finish Caleb off in retaliation day starts breaking. They have to retreat to the car along with Mae, Homer, and the still captured Sarah to stay out of the sun. Homer still has plans to turn Sarah but Mae has other intentions. She grabs Sarah and jumps out of the back window into the sun running Sarah towards Caleb who meets them and saves Mae with his coat. Homer, distraught over the loss of his new infatuation jumps out to make chase. Unfortunately for him He had nothing to shade him from the sun and before he can make much of a chase he succumbs to the burning and explodes. Two down!

Knowing that they have nothing left Jesse and Diamondback turn around yet again and make a last ditch effort to run down the three annoyances. Their plan never takes hold as the sun gets them as well and they lose control of the car just before, yep, they both explode. Three and four down!

Caleb takes Mae back home, works the transfusion magics on her and the two, so it seems live happily ever after.


Thoughts, both good and bad
So for me this was a strange watch. I know this will come out strange but throughout both viewings of the movie I kept having the same thought. And I very well could be completely off base and/or off my rocker here but. What really classifies this as a horror movie? I mean other than the vampires, which yeah I admit that is a big hurdle but still. The vampire lore was more of a backdrop I felt for a movie that to me played almost more like a drama/action/comedy and of course modern western. It just happened to have vampires in it. I've noticed this in the past with other vampire movies and TV shows as well, most of which admittedly were made after "Near Dark" so take that for what you will..

Mind you I'm not complaining about the movie. In fact I believe that "Near Dark" blended those genre's quite well and did so without the hokeyness that it could have fallen into. What I'm getting at here is that to me it almost seems as if vampire flicks, at least this kind of them, have almost moved out of the horror genre and created a new one of their own, or at least some sort of strange multi-sub genre.

So on this new standard that I may or may not have just created where does "Near Dark" fall for me? It's gotta be near the top. What the movie lacked in scary (again as I see it) it certainly didn't lack in intensity. Hell Bill Paxton's Severen had the intensity quota filled all by his excellently obnoxious self.

The writing and storytelling for the most part were actually a lot tighter than I expected. It's the small things that I liked such. Severen's line "Cut the shit. I know you're awake. I can smell it." for instance, a small thing that said a few things. It let us know an ability that this flavor of vampire has, also it spoke to the nature of his character. As did the moment with the spur. Jesse and Diamondback's mannerisms alone let you know where they stood. While I'm on that subject, Lance Henriksen was fantastic as Jesse.



But it wasn't all great. A few small things kind of got to me. The first one was Homer (Joshua Miller), pun not intended but not rejected either! Seriously what was up with him? One of his first lines was about being a "big man in a little body" and then Jesse throughout referred to him as "old man" he even smoked and played cards as if he were indeed an adult in a kids body. But then inexplicably other times (in private, not in public for show) he acted as the child. That is really why the child turned into a vampire doesn't really work for me almost ever, they are a recipe for plot holes or confusion. Also Homer's dialog was, well, lame. "The name's Homer. H-O-M-E-R. Mispronounce it... and I wouldn't... wanna... be you." Really? Thats all ya got little guy? Well ok then.

Then again at least H-O-M-E-R (Hey apparently thats how he wants it said) got some lines. Diamondback (Janette Goldstein) barely said a thing. Mostly she just clung to Jesse. Though she did have the most awesome hair in the entire movie, and she was wielded that knife pretty in the bar scene. Still it seemed like a waste of some good talent.

By the way. If you want to see a slightly less entertaining version of pretty much that exact same bar scene, go watch "The Thirst." But then, why would you want to see the less entertaining?...


Final Though
Bottom line. "Near Dark" was a lot of fun, if you haven't seen it I think you really should. Odds are you have seen something influenced by this and odds are they weren't as good.

Also ya know, just two more small facts. #1 as previously mentioned, No Reiser! And #2 as you may have noticed almost everyone blows up!

P.S.
We like the boom!



(no, I'm...I'm not sure why)

Nope still not being productive

But I did find another video.

Remember a while back when I posted the College Humor video of the lip sync to Harvey Danger?

Well now the peeps at Rev3 are getting into the act with a little INXS


Lip Dub - Need You Tonight by INXS from sarahlane on Vimeo.

Clearly I need to check on Oxygen once in a while

Because apparently they do things like this..



Many thanks to Stacie who put a bumper sticker on her Facebook page which made me do a little searching to find out just exactly who Tanisha was. That was awesome!

now I'm going back to pretending to be productive

Number 1 fan!

I've done the rounds, movie wise anyway. I've seen quite a few of them. Recently I've discovered how much I really enjoy horror flicks of most kinds. It still feels very strange to me when I look at all of the horror movies and slashers and thrillers that I had so heavily avoided for so long. I blame it on the timing of my birth. When I was just but little, during the formative years of the awakening of my brain my brothers were in their prime scary movie watching years. They also were coincidentally just starting out into their jerk years. What does this mean? Torture the young one! Oh and they did, they had me freaked out about everything from Jaws (one of my now favorite movies) to Freddy (I'm ambivalent about the first two but love the 3rd movie in his series so far) to Jason (awesome!) to Michael Myers (Also quite awesome himself) and so on. There was even a time that they had me so freaked out that I couldn't stay in the room when they played that really shitty "Jaws" NES game.

Don't get me wrong there was nothing really wrong with my brothers, just the normal sibling torture. I knew that if anything happened they had my back. Unless of course a vampire showed up, then it was every man for themselves, and they reminded me constantly that they were quicker than me...

So though I've always loved movies I really never looked into the scary ones for the longest time. Well past the point of being afraid, at a certain point it wasn't the fear anymore that kept me away, just habit and conditioning. The first real horror type movie that I actually made an effort to see was "Scream" in '96. Late '96 as a matter of fact since was a VHS affair. As I understand it that was a pretty good jumping on point for the genre, which I agree with.

I really enjoyed "Scream" even without getting the inside jokes and references that I now find easier and easier to spot. In fact back in the day the only one I remember really catching was Wes Craven's cameo as Fred the janitor (clad in Freddy's sweater and hat). I won't lie, the slight campyness of if all helped me stay into it (my love of the B flicks was alive and well back then as well) the humor was really well done as well. Not forced or unbearably hokey as can be the case easily. Back on track though "Scream" contains a few really memorable gruesome scenes (at least for me). The first one that comes to mind is the entire sequence with Casey Becker (Drew Barrymore) being chased,stabbed, gutted, and strung up. Now it could be because that was my initiation scene, I'm not sure but I do know that the scene really sticks with me. Especially the last bit where her parents discover her...just creepy. The other standout scene and this one I'm fairly sure is just one of my quirks is Principal Himbry (Henry Winkler) hanging from the goal post. Though that scene is more memorable because, well lets face it seeing Henry Winkler murdered like that is just about the most heartbreaking thing ever. How could anyone even think of harming him??

So yeah I dug Scream, I even caught the next two sequels in the theater, I didn't love them as much as the first. But I hold a soft spot for them since they are in the family of that what brung me. Sadly during those times I still didn't discover my "love" for the genre simply because I was staying with the new movies. That means I was stuck with the "I Know What You Did Last Summer"s of the world and the like. In other words cash in crap. Luckily thanks to the net and some awesome blogs some of which I've even mentioned I've corrected my past bad movie habits.

So where was I? Oh yeah, gristly terrible images that I've exposed myself to in the name of entertainment. I won't go into why I (or any of us) are drawn to this stuff, if I tried I'd probably depress myself and worry myself into therapy and I don't want that. But yeah honestly I have seen some horrible things, sometimes I do get to wondering if I've totally desensitized myself and distorted what I would find horrible in reality. Have you seen "Lovers Lane? Talk about ouch! That isn't even mentioning the hell that the classics (Jason, Jason's mom and Myers, etc...) have unleashed on poor unsuspecting (usually) teens.

Luckily for me there are occasional scenes that really do touch me and make me realize that yes I'm still human and not psychotic (hopefully). As I previously mentioned, two scenes in "Scream" bring me back to reality, a handful of others exist as well. And then there is this one, which I've seen quite a few times in many places but it wasn't until earlier tonight that I actually sat down and watched the entire movie.

Ladies and gentlemen I give to you a scene from "Misery" that no matter how many times I see it I still jump and cringe.



....Go ahead, call me a wimp if you like but dammit that is just messed up. Just when you are starting to recover she goes to the other foot!

"Man Colds" are the worst!

Godiva VS. Ninotchka

Sometimes I miss the 80's

Mahalo Daily presents: The Oscars in 60 seconds

While I sort through the vast wasteland the I utilize as a brain for any vague remnant memories of "The Manitou" to put down I thought I'd share something else good with you.

some Tuesday for Wednesday

Unexpectedly Entertaining

F&G

I was bored earlier and going through my DVD collection nothing sounded good (it was one of those nights). That is until I came to my TV DVDs and yanked out "Freaks and Geeks." The show just never disappoints...well except for the part where there wasn't a second season but that isn't really the shows fault.


Doesn't Seth Rogen look fairly clean cut here? Relatively speaking of course.

We'll file this show under the "Too good and therefore had to be squashed" category.

Stay tuned next time when no movies sound good again and I drop in some "Wonderfalls"